To start off, I have been very very worried because my BF called me and wants to talk to me face-to-face tomorrow. His tone was sad and upset sounding, and I fear the worst may be coming. My gut tells me that tomorrow may be the end of our relationship. ='( If it is I can tell you all that I'm going to be very very upset, almost depressed if you would. I really love him and we had a talk similar a few weeks ago where we said that we would take small steps to recovering our relationship. He claimed that we had "lost our spark," and it's because we don't ever go into deep conversations. I can not hold conversations because I run out of things to say and talk about. If I am able to hold a conversation, I don't want to rant because then I feel as if I'm boring him. So tomorrow I'll see what happens. I just hope that what I am fearing is just my imagination getting the better of me. I really do x.x I may be a strong Aries, but I could hardly say I am a ram, I'm more of a sheep.
As for gaining, I can't seem to get into the mindset for it. Because of what is going on in my life, revolving around my worries for tomorrow and my mom's disapproval of me having a BF, I just can't seem to want to gain. And if things transpire as my mind sees it; I lose my BF; who knows what will happen to gaining...and me psychologically and emotionally. (However, I won't go off the deep end for thing like suicide and all that. I'll probably just be in a deep depression.) So if I do drop of the gaining radar, mainly my blog here and IMs (or if I don't reply on my IMs) then you probably know why.
Well, hopefully things go well, and I'm worrying for nothing.
Thanks for reading.
well id have to say that maybe having a bf isnt a good idea at the time being, but the other thing is for a relationship to work remember tht conversation is key and tht when u hold a convo it doesnt matter if it bores him, as long as he listens to u and if u run out of things to talk about u could awaays go for a walk or something instead and as for gaining well u dont really have to be in the mind set and actually it helps to eat when ur depressed trust me food is everybodies friend, cause if u get depressed u dont wanna eat and thts not a good thing cause u can die tht way so why starve urself, as for ur mom, maybe shes right about having a bf bc ur young, and as far as ur mom goes my mom was the same way when i came out, u just have to show her this is who u are and its nobodies fault its just the way uve always been, and always will be
ReplyDeleteif u need to talk some more i am here to talk, my name is tony my IM is tjj240@msn.com